One of the great dilemmas a parent will face is when their child is no longer cute for doing baby or child-like things.  When does mispronouncing the word spaghetti cease to draw a laugh or a smile?  When should a child know how to pronounce the word library?  Only a parent can tell their child it's time to put childish ways behind them, but unfortunately parents are the last to know.

Your child is never as talented as you think. Always remember that. Photo courtesy Think Stock
Your child is never as talented as you think. Always remember that. Photo courtesy Think Stock
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One quick way for the "cute" to disappear is to have a 2nd child.  Suddenly they jump from cute to obnoxious in less than 48 hours.  It's not like the "cute" disappears, it just transfers to the next child.  Then the next child.  Then the next child.  Parents proudly walk around displaying this "cute" any chance they get.  Funny thing, though, the "cute" isn't nearly as cute to friends, co-workers, ladies in the check-out line or any other complete stranger for whom you display this "cute".  Until children learn the word "no" they're simply trained animals.  These animals happen to be at the top of the food chain, but they're not yet displaying human behavior.  Congratulations!  Your child can stand up by the time they're 11 months old!!  A foal comes out and walks within seconds, so if you don't mind I'll hold my applause until the end of today's show.

I only say such harsh things here because I want you new dads to know every other dad is thinking it.  Much like a Dr. Pepper 10, leave showing off the baby to the ladies... we're good.  The only time a dad should show off a "trick" he's trained his child to perform is when it's something manly, such as burping, cursing or spitting.  Never should these words come out of a man's mouth:  "Little Susie went potty on the big girl potty today".  NEVER!!

So, she's talented? What would Simon Cowell say? Photo courtesy Think Stock
So, she's talented? What would Simon Cowell say? Photo courtesy Think Stock
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My two boys are (sadly) carbon copies of me, and the cute wears off at around age seven.  That means I've got Logan for two more years of being cute, then it's seven years of annoying questions, then it's seven years of us hating each other, then seven years of not really talking much, then... Oh, let's face it, I'll have croaked by then, so who cares.  Right now Logan is still on the fringe of mispronouncing words being cute.  He's grown up in a home that loves their Oklahoma Sooners, but for some reason he pronounces Oklahoma with an "H" at the beginning, as in "Hoklahoma".  He even corrected me one day when I said "Oklahoma".  That's cute.  Maybe.  His preschool took care of him pronouncing "yellow" like "lellow".

As a dad, you've really got to go with your gut when it comes to the right time for the "cute" to end.  One week your son will ask for a "'nana" and you'll smile while you hand him a banana.  The next week the question will be followed by your answer, "It's 'BA-nana'!!  'BA-nana'!!  For Pete's sake, how many times do I have to say it!?!?!".  If ever in doubt, just assume everyone else in the world thinks your child is an awkward, obnoxious annoyance, and you'll know to do the right thing.

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